Eating Chinese food
Making small talk
Grandma orders spicy food
‘cause the townie ladies never do
Gram, I have something to tell you
no that’s not right
I order the seafood dish
‘cause I’m on a diet
Gram, there’s something I’ve wanted to tell you…
no, that’s too long
We talk about the weather
She asks about my other sister
and I tell her she’s getting hitched next year
Gram, I like guys!
no… that’s just crazy
We talk about my father
and yes he’s still a loser
Gram, I’d like to invite my boyfriend over
no, I don’t have one of those
We get our food
We talk about how good the restaurant is
and I sip my much needed glass of wine
Gram, I had another reason for coming up to visit you…
no, she’s eating now
I look at my plate and take another bite
I take another sip of wine
Gram, I don’t know how to tell you this…
no, that’s just way too true
We talk about me
I get up and go to the bathroom
more to calm down than to get relief
Gram, there’s something else I wanted to talk about…
no, that’s too awkward
She mentions how messy my car is
and I say it’s usually much worse
Gram, I…
no, she’s talking again
She says I need a girlfriend to clean for me
wow, she’s old fashioned
This is it, this is my opening
Actually… I need a boyfriend, Gram
I’m gay.
I already knew honey,
and I love you anyway.
